The Daily Plunge

A few months ago I posted some new fresh mascot ideas for Democrat party. Much fun was had by all but I’m not out of ideas. I expect these suggestions to keep coming so mascots is now an officially category here at The Daily Plunge. Let’s talk about Telly Monster. Here’s a guy that is afraid of change, paranoid, and prone to manic behavior. That sounds just about like Al Gore except Telly doesn’t grow a beard after personal struggles. The world is a scary place. We all have every reason to be worried and paranoid. Halliburton owns the White House. The War on Terror is a never ending conflict perpetrated on exploited middle-easterners for oil. Christians still insist on believing in the Bible. Worst of all, the world faces the greatest challenge in the history of mankind with the threat of Global Warming.

Telly puts a face on the fear each of us has about our bleak and hopeless future. He’s enlightened, while others insist he should be more optimistic, Telly understands the complex and frightening future that awaits unless the government does something about it. The best part is that Telly is likable. Despite the gloomy worldview, he likes to hop around on a pogo stick and play the triangle. Frankly it’s impossible not to love someone who does that. Telly represents the masses. People that need protection, people that need government protection, people like Telly, people like the Democrat party. The great patriots that have “he’s not my president” bumper stickers. Does it get any better than telling your fellow citizens that citizenship is void unless there’s a Democrat is in the White House? Indeed it does not. For part-time Americans everywhere, Telly Monster is the answer.