For a measly $10 billion or so, our beloved Uncle Sam could supply every household in America with a full keg of beer. Sound far-fetched? Well, it is, because the government would rather spend it on pork projects that will help guarantee that certain politicians remain in office in perpetuity.
But this is the ultimate pork (beer) barrel project, practically guaranteed to win the undying devotion of tens of millions of Americans. Providing a keg in every refrigerator has the added benefit of finally paying those reparations I’ve been lobbying for since I turned 21.
Our ancestors, some of whom are actually still alive, lived through one of the darkest eras in American history. Beginning in 1919, our forefathers toiled under the yoke of non-alcoholic beverages. Though a Constitutional Amendment rectified the suffering in 1933, Prohibition was a catastrophe that denied citizens the right to drink beer.
It’s about time the government paid for this horrendous mistake and offered reparations to the descendants of those who were denied the right to a cold beer, even if Schlitz was the brew of choice back then.
With money apparently no object in Washington these days, what’s $10 billion or so? It’s a drop in the bucket, or keg in this case. Since 2007, about $11 trillion has been allocated for “economic recovery” of varying stripes. Just think if this money had been properly allocated. Each fridge (or garage, porch or deck) in America could have been supplied with 1,000 kegs.
Obviously, this is probably way too much beer for the average household, excepting frat houses scattered here and there in this great land. Even ten kegs per household would be acceptable and would still represent only a fraction of the money those Looney Tunes in Washington are spending on their cronies and special interests.
The ancient formulation of “a chicken in every pot” would have yielded 22,000 chickens per pot per household, but I think beer is the better deal here. It’s about time Americans stood up for their right to Prohibition reparations, and their right, of course, to party.
This is a good idea….the Irish, Brits and Germans would get more than say the Pakistani and the Iranians….. for whom it is forbidden.
[...] may recall that, in an earlier post, Club Soda called for Prohibition reparations to be paid with a keg in every fridge. Anderson Cooper, China, Climate Bill, John Kerry, Massachusetts, Shirley [...]
[...] book just reinforces Club Soda’s brilliant idea of A Keg in Every Fridge. The nation definitely deserves prohibition reparations. Alcohol, Dry, Income Tax, Joseph [...]